Let God write and use your story

I have noticed that there are two types of women out there, women who think they are so flawed they are damaged forever and are constantly finding things wrong with themselves, or women who pretend that they are perfect and have no flaws.  I am in a women’s study and it is so fun to watch all of the girls in our study share and open up.  The study we are currently doing is the “Breaking Free” by Beth Moore, a great study for all women to go through.  It helps you find a way to find your real flaws, notice that you have them and find a way to break free from them in Christ knowing that we are a perfect creation no matter what our past and that no matter what we do, have done, are doing.  We can break free from the bondage we are held under by those sins and let go knowing God really can be our everything.  He is our strength, our humility and our peace when we ask him to be. They are a beautiful group of women, but when sitting there I have realized this that when we open up we are either the girl who ‘spills our guts thinking we are so flawed we have so much to fix and can’t find much good in ourselves,’ or we are the ‘strong type,’ and portray that their lives are perfect and they have no flaws. I love the girls in my group and by no means am I cutting either party down, I belong to the group that always has to find the flaws. I think most women are in that category as most of the girls open up they find more and more wrong.  But really this is not a strange thing since from day one girls are taught to look at themselves as something is wrong with them, they aren’t the Barbie doll they play with and think they should be. We grow up wanting people to desire us for all the wrong reasons. So, the first place we find flawed is something with our outward appearance.  When I was growing up I wanted to be thin like all my friends. I was never overly heavy but I was not a stick like many of my friends were and that was what I was always told was the ‘cute’ little girl. My hair was stick straight and I always had a little meat on my bones.  I grew up thinking that thin was the best thing, that in order to be pretty you should be a stick, wear makeup to cover up my ugly face and lets just say I was looking at myself the way many little girls do, which ends up making me feel like I am ugly. Ugly to a girl usually equals unworthy, terrible, not enough and we can never measure up to what everyone else wants us to be.  When we are older we then start focusing on our insides. We already have been focusing on the outside flaws we own for so long that we know exactly how to pick ourselves apart to find the flaws.  We tear ourselves apart inwardly and constantly compare ourselves to what we see in others. We want to portray that we are the girl who has the perfect figure, perfect face, perfect clothes and when we go to church we want to be the girl that everyone wants to be, with the perfect kids, perfect husband and perfect spiritual life. Since we aren’t that way we then think that there is a lot to fix, and sure there is a lot to fix we are only human. But what does God say about us? What does he really think? Isn’t that what should matter? We strive to have that perfect marriage when in all honesty the only perfect marriage is going to be that of Christ and his Bride. Saying you have a perfect marriage is like saying you are perfect and can walk on water.  Marriage is built on two people so even if you are perfect, trust me your spouse is not, and they shouldn’t be either they are only human. So each marriage has its ups and downs, each person has their own unique ups and downs in life and no one is perfect.  Even if people try and portray that they are always happy, always got it good and always have the right answers, in all honesty they don’t, unless they are Jesus Christ they can’t be.  But, no matter if they are perfect just remember, God is not comparing you to them He is comparing you to who he created you to be.  Psalm 139:13-14 “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”  God created all of us individually for a purpose and with a plan in mind for our lives. Our job is to live how God intended us to live, knowing that He allows us to go through our struggles and temptations and everything else that helps to make us flawed in our own little ways so we could one day learn from them, grow from what we learn and share what we have learned with others.  The next time you find someone you think seems to be perfect and have the perfect life just remember you have a story being written which will be effective for God( they do too they just have a different one). Which is easier to learn from, someone who has it all together just because they had a great life without a lot of problems or, do you learn better from someone who made those mistakes, has been on the rough roads, and can share the experiences with you to help you learn and grow? Personally I learn more from someone who shares a story than from the person who seems unflawed.  Those stories are many times what gives me hope that I am not alone and not a lost cause.  So I guess my point is to be thankful for the flaws, don’t ignore them ask God to help you conquer them and fix them, but don’t get down on yourself either because you have them. Be thankful for each and every flaw you have knowing that God has a purpose for what you are going through and trust that one day he is going to use your experience to let you help someone else get through their own set of flaws. May God be gentle with those who do not yet have a story to tell and may He use the ones who do have a story to glorify and bring honor to Himself to enhance His kingdom. God sees you as the perfect person He can use as long as you are open and willing to let Him use you and your story.