To my daughter Raegyn,
Since I can recall I always wanted to only have boys in my house. I loved the idea of no one being prissy, sassy or having mood swings. I loved the idea of playing with guns, legos, wrestling matches, being allowed to get down and dirty while playing, not to mention not have a single soul looking up to me to show them how to act like a lady. The idea of pink being in my home was just nuts, as I dislike the color pink. I didn't want to have to deal with those late night talks about boys, or deal with drama of girl friends being mean and stupid later on in life. I didn't want to have to explain what a time of the month is, or that you don't have cancer you are just developing into a lovely lady. I was excited to have only boys in my house because lets face it, we girls are expensive with the make up, shoes, clothes, bra's and anything else we randomly get our minds set on that we 'need.' The biggest part was I love your brothers so much that I have no idea if I could ever love a girl as much as I do them.
My oh my little Raegyn, how you have changed my world 100%. The day you were born I cried. Not because I was sad that you were a girl but because I was somehow so excited about the whole thought that you were not a boy. You were a whole new adventure. My eyes were opened so quickly to a whole new light. I went from feeling scared and never wanting a girl to never wanting my life without one.
The first thing that changed was my love for pink. I love it truly love the color pink. You look so beautiful in it, but then again you look beautiful in anything.
I sit and listen to you every day making noise trying to talk to me and I look forward to the long nights now in my future where we will sit in your room with you chatting my ear off about all your life. I look forward to hearing your woes and your happy moments. I look forward to listening to you talk about your secret crushes, while inwardly I will sit and be praying that those boys will not hurt you or destroy your innocence.
I have found a real reason to finally take my own mothers advice about acting like a lady, something I have detested hearing my whole life, but look forward to teaching to you. I can say I never listened to her about needing to act like a lady until the day you were born and I realized I wanted more than anything for you to have that example in-front of you to guide you.
And though I still do not look forward to having to explain those few natural parts of life to you that will happen, as they do to all women, I do look forward to the days when I know you have them for I know then that you are reaching a mature state of life and that you have made it through childhood. I get to be excited about watching you grow into a young lady, knowing that childhood is going to soon be far behind you and your future will be bright with wonder and excitement of you growing into a young adult with a full life ahead of you.
My world has completely changed because of you. Before you were born I even had a few tears being scared you may be a girl feeling like I would never be a good enough mom for you. I know I will never be a perfect mom, but I promise to be the best mother and example of a woman to you that I can be, I'll even do my best to learn to act like a lady.
I am so thankful God chose to give me you. He gave me you, a girl, not just any girl, you are my beautiful, little girl and I love you more than words will ever express. You complete our family and yes, I have learned my little love that I can love a girl just as much as I do my sons. All three of you children are amazing and I am blessed to be able to call you all mine. You have changed our family forever my Little Rae, but most of all I know you have changed me forever!
Love you my precious little girl!
~Mommy~
