"there will never be a church without gossip or competition." (Max Lucado When God Whispers your name)
Now this may be a true statement, but what has me irritated is the statement itself. It is so matter of fact that it's like we as a Christian society have condoned such actions. I am even to the point of saddened that statements are made like this all the time within the body of believers. Hearing words like, "well we are only human," or "what do you expect?we aren't all perfect," or one of my personal favorites, "all women gossip in some shape way or form, it's just part of who we are." All of these types of statements have become the norm to hear in our generation about the church.
Yet I can't help but know that making statements like that sadden's God's heart. He has given us His Spirit of righteousness through His Son! We are to act differently than the rest of the world because our purpose in life has changed with the acceptance of the Holy Spirit.
Ephesians 4:21-24
Since you have heard about Jesus and have learned the truth that comes from him, throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception. Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy.
So why am I so perplexed if I find this statement from Max Lucado to be true? Because this statement is so true and many others similar to it we risk running off fellow believers because we are not doing what we were designed to do as united followers of Christ.
We are told in scripture to confront people (siblings in Christ) who are in sin. (Matt 18:15; Luke 17:3; Gal 6:1 James 5:19&20)
If the people within the church did exactly what the Bible said to do instead of sweeping things under the rug and trying to ignore the dysfunction we wouldn't have a church were gossip is excepted as the norm, or hidden agendas, or politics.
No, if we did what the Bible said as in confronting a brother or sister living in a sinful way and nip it all in the butt we actually would have the church of Christ. A church where grace and love abound and everyone works with the same common goal! We wouldn't be confused when someone tries to correct us because we would know and trust they are doing it to help the body of Christ become stronger.
But instead what we have is people who just excuse another's actions, or a group of people's actions, as though they are now just the norm that is excepted. Instead of confronting people, because let's face it that would mean we are judging someone(sarcasm here ppl), we just either pretend we are better than them because we know that they know better and are choosing to do wrong, or we join them in their sin issues coming up with whatever excuse we seem confident will fit our personal desire to join them. Or you have the worst one yet, seeing it but yet refusing to confront them because you will be seen as mean or judgmental.
And one of the most saddening parts to all of this is the leaders within the churches don't even stand up to stop it because they fear the people's reactions more than fearing God.
Wrong! So so wrong!
The church of Christ is suppose to be a body of believers joined in one spirit with one common goal, to glorify Jesus Christ! But how can we say we are doing that if we are allowing other brothers and sisters to continue to live in sin?
If we are one body but one part of the body is injured (deceived, infected) is it not better to help the hurt part of the body rather than to pretend it's not there. If we cover it up and ignore it we risk the infection spreading throughout the rest of the body and eventually killing the heart.
The Bible talks about the order to do things when you see a brother or sister in the wrong and it starts with confronting them alone. If they don't change then you find one or two others to go with you and if that doesn't work you bring the issue to the church elders or pastor who in turn figures out the best rout to deal with what would seem to be a very deep infection if it has become serious enough that the person needs to be brought before the church. (Matthew 18:15-17)
The truth is we don't hold to this scripture at all! It's like we have picked and chosen which parts we want to follow and which parts we want to just ignore or find ways around them.
Here in lies the problem then, the root cause as to why the Christian church as a whole can not seem to shake free; we are allowing ourselves to stay infected and choosing to try and pretend the problems aren't there.
So once we are willing to take action the next step can actually be the hardest one to get right. How are we suppose to confront the issue of another's sin but not come across as judging them?
Ephesians 4:15
"Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of the body, the church."
How to speak to your fellow Christian in love:
Step one: we have to examine our own hearts. Make sure you don't have a log in your own eye before trying to remove the speck. (Matt 7:3-5)
Step two: make sure the sin you see in the person is actually a biblical sin, not an opinion you have formed about how something should be. If you can't back up your confrontation with scripture there is a good chance you may be jumping the gun on an opinion rather than truth.
If they have sinned against you personally make sure you have already forgiven the sin (Col. 3:13)
If they have sinned against you personally make sure you have already forgiven the sin (Col. 3:13)
Step three: pray for words of wisdom to help the person. caring for part of the body is ok, scrapping the wound and leaving it there to bleed alone is not exactly helpful and can be more damaging to the body.
No, first you confront in care, do so out of love for the sibling in Christ. Then make sure they know you are there to help them, aka offer them hope and a way to fix the problem. And then once you have offered to be the helping hand make sure to keep going there to be a friend, a true help to the body part while it heals. Otherwise you risk letting others in the body who may come angrily behind you and tear the wound back open and your sibling may loose site of the help that was offered.
Typically people don't seek help even when it is offered.We often slink into the "I can do it myself" mode,or "I really don't want to bother them" mode.
Taking care of the body is part of the Christians job! If someone in your church saw you were following wrong doctrine or not living in a way which is Godly wouldn't you want someone to come to you and offer to help you? Most of us don't even realize we have a problem let alone know how to fix it once it is brought to our attention. But wouldn't you want someone to come along side you with a gentle touch to help you identify the problem and be there as your support system? I know I would.
When we are the body of Christ and treat each other as equally important members to the body, it is then easier for all of us to function the way we should because we will spend less time trying to mend wounds and more time praising God together and sewing and reaping the Lords harvest!
Ephesians 4:16
He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love.
